Response to Daily Prompt: Blogger of Repute
I can remember clearly in high school that I had a reputation as ‘that one quiet Asian girl.’ There weren’t a lot of Asians in my school. I was the one no one really spoke to but everyone wanted to partner with for an assignment.
To tell you the truth, I was pretty quiet back then. I didn’t speak much but when I did it was the brutal truth. That was probably why everyone thought I was a bit unpleasant. Plus no one really understood my mental illness and thought I was just completely off the rails sometimes, especially since half the time I was depressed and the other half I was angry and impulsive.
These days, I still have that reputation for being blunt. Everyone still thinks I’m shy, which is false. I’m just an introvert. Yes, there is a difference. In my university dorms, everyone on my floor was quite surprised how truthful I actually was. I wasn’t well liked because of that. It’s really understandable. Hardly anyone can handle the truth.
I used to care so much about what everyone thought about me, which is the reason why I kept my mental illness to myself. Some hear “bipolar” and they immediately think “insane”. Nowadays I couldn’t care less. I do a little but I’ve been evolving more and more into my own person, one that I’m really comfortable with.
So I guess whatever reputation I have, or will eventually have, shouldn’t really matter too much to me. Of course, others’ words will still affect me but I’ve gotten better at just… ignoring them. Every once in a while you’ll get a negative reputation, and sometimes you can’t really do anything about it. Take a deep breath and push through. You can do it.
Oh how corny I sound right now.