Maybe – Just Maybe – It’s Me

I was recently speaking with my psychiatrist and I was complaining (I do that a lot, I’m sorry) about how in my classes there are those people who slow down the class by constantly asking what I consider to be stupid questions. I find them unnecessary because the professor had gone over those specific questions in the past few classes. Even more irritating is when multiple people ask the same exact question. I then spend the rest of the class yelling angrily in my head.

My psychiatrist then pointed out that maybe the ‘problem’ wasn’t other people but actually me. Even with my hypo-/mania laying dormant, common symptoms still tend to manifest. So unless I’m really depressed, my mind constantly works in fast-forward. It’s one of the things I actually like about this disorder because, well, I seem to understand things a lot more quickly. But at the same time it makes me sound pretentious because I actually do forget that not everyone around me works in the exact same way.

I’m not trying to brag or insinuate that I think I’m smarter than everyone in my class. In Berkeley in particular, I sometimes felt a little lost. But I like to think that I’m somewhat in the middle or maybe a little higher (isn’t there a correlation between intelligence and mental illness?). I just like being educated in a wide variety of subjects, and absorb information easily.

So yes, it’s probably just me being unfair to everyone else.

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2 thoughts on “Maybe – Just Maybe – It’s Me

  1. Hiya Deirdre! 🙂

    I would probably be one of ‘those’ people who asks for a little clarification on some subjects and concepts, I’m well known for being a pain in the arse and asking questions! I can understand your frustration though.

    Here’s one of those questions right now, though it isn’t to be a pain. You seem to have some bruising on your neck, are you alright? Or are you just naturally dark around that area of your body? I hope you’re ok.

    All the best Deirdre and I hope all is well for you.

    – Phil

    1. Hello!

      Actually, that’s the lomo filtering I used. haha. I usually need to make the photo darker so that the white blocks of text will show on my home page. I’m too lazy to do it sometimes. So, no worries!

      Though also, my backpack usually weighs around 40lbs… I carry a lot of things to class…

      Hope all is well for you too! Have a good week, well rest of the week since it’s already Wednesday.

      – Deirdre

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