I’m a Freebird

No, I did not just go through a breakup.

Response to Daily Prompt: Que Sera Sera

(Get it? In the photo I’m making a choice… a highly important one at that.)

“There’s nowhere you can be that isn’t where you’re meant to be.” I don’t quite remember where I got that from, though I do think it’s from a song. I’ll make a mental note to search that up a little later (Edit: It’s from All You Need is Love by the Beatles).

The debate about fate and free will is one of those topics we may never truly stop discussing because, well, it’s subjective and it touches upon dozens of other discussions.

Me?

I’m an advocate for free will, however there was quite a bit of time when I believed everything – including a simple coin toss – was all up to fate. That mostly had to do with my past religious beliefs. Most of the members of my family were deep-seated Catholics and so I was pretty much forced to adapt the principles as well. I was constantly told by everyone, especially my grandparents, that God had my whole life planned out for me and I simply accepted it.

Over time, I began to shape my own beliefs and eventually came to be what I am now – agnostic. I don’t like to think that I’m meant to be at a certain place at a certain time with a certain person. I don’t like to think that I have absolutely no control over my life; that my choices aren’t truly my own. I don’t even think chance happenings are fate – they’re just chance happenings. Everyone has their own opinion and that just happens to be mine.

And even if we did have our own destiny, we have every ability to change it. Too many people over think what’s “meant” or “supposed” to be, especially when it comes to significant others, when they could be focused on the path they did take. If we somehow realize we made mistake, then we can find a way to change that.

A while back when I was in the middle of a severe depressive episode, a friend told me that “everything would be okay because God has his own plan for [me] and put someone in a situation they couldn’t handle.” I respected her belief, as I do with everyone’s, but I just wasn’t convinced. I couldn’t help but think about victims of suicide, homicide, and etc. I didn’t believe that was what was meant to happen to them.

But I digress a little.

At the same time the idea that we have complete control over our lives is a bit frightening, isn’t it? Though, it’s an exhilarating kind of fear. Remember those choose-your-own-adventure books (my favorite was the Goosebumps series)? That’s what I believe all our lives are like. We start of with inherent possessions in a certain situation. Eventually we’re presented with obstacles that requires us to make a choice that then has it’s own outcome. That consequence in turn forces us to make another decision. Like I said, those decisions aren’t always the right ones but are the ones we have to live with.

On a side note, I cheated a lot with the choose-your-own-adventure books. I would save the page, make a decision and see what the consequence was… Hey, they were scary stories and I somehow always died. So I just went to the previous decision and chose again. But I didn’t cheat in life… whatever that implies. I can’t go back and change the past, which I’m surprisingly alright with.

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